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Self portrait. Almost.

março 12, 2017

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Nix.

One of the most challenging feelings to deal with. One of the hardest emotions. The not. Nothing is. Nothing become. What once was, is no more. It is not. Nevermore. The extinction of what once came to life. Nonbeing of subsistence. The latent nonexistence. From all, to the nothingness. Emptiness. Expected.

Untitled, I guess

It just hurts to see it all ending like that. We all get hurt at some point, but it's a fact that most of the pain could have been avoided by different actions. I don't blame myself for feeling too much. No. Never will. Guess not many can see / relate with the depth I have within. The flame keeps burning, even after several attempts to put it out. Might be seen as a karma, I guess. But that's how life is. And people... Some are. Some are not. I truly hate how humans can be vulnerable. A.k.a: I have this vulnerability in me. Yes, I am one of them and I know that pretty well. Doesn't even matter all the stuff I've been through before, I guess I haven't learn yet. I do have higher standards now, and my "filter" is harder than before, but somehow I always end up letting people going though it, and it always goes to hell. At some point I wondered if the problem was me. If I was good enough for anyone in the world. But yes I am. I'm just tryi...

For the sake of my sanity, I'm back. Maybe.

My last post in a blog was circa may 2017, or so. Guess having a blog came in handy. I mean... Just need a place to throw up what I've been hiding inside for a while. Locked all this shit so well, it's hard to find words to explain even to myself. But not the right time for it, I assume. As everything is still a bit messy and shady, I must pick up the pieces first in order to actually understand what I want. To be really honest here, I know pretty well what I want, but I should be protected from it. What I have to figure out is what I really need .

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